It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
