things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
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