New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
