turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
It was a blind-side dick pic.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
