Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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