she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
