If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I need to calm my uterus...
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
