he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
How's work?
Spinning.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
