The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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