I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
