You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
