Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
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