well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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