is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize
