Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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