a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
