I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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