it wasn't lemon gatorade
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
