Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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