I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
