Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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