he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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