yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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