Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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