This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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