how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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