He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just forgot I was standing up.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize