i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
