I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize