Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Randomize
