we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
