...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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