she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I think I won the penis lottery.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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