I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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