is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Bring me that man meat
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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