I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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