I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize