Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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