If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
