Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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