where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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