everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
