Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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