New invention idea: vibrating tampons
she peed on how many people?
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Well I just put wine in my tea
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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