thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die, sorry about rent.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
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