just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
He has the fingertips of a God
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