We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
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