i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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