Will you blow on my dice?
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize