yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
